Saturday, February 23, 2008

Freaking Myself Out



Does anyone else ever do this?

So tonight Easton and I went to the outlets just for something to do in the evening while Steve was out studying. We cruised the mall for about 45 minutes, and then grabbed some cookies before heading out the door. Right before the door I stopped to get my keys out and have everything ready so I could just throw him in the car (it was windy and I didn't want him sitting in his stroller while I looked for my keys). As I'm getting my bag out, these 3 guys stop behind me and start whispering to each other (I automatically assume they are whispering about me)...and that's where it all starts. This irrational paranoia develops and I start freaking out that something bad is going to happen. I imagine the worst.

I hurried so fast out the door I think I rammed the stroller a couple times, probably giving Easton whiplash, until I'm finally outside. Then I walk rather swiftly to my car, sharpest key facing outward-just in case, and casually looking over my shoulder for anyone following me (of course nobody is). Once I realize that no one is behind me, I relax a little and concentrate on getting Easton in the car, my cookies safely on my seat and the stroller in the trunk. Then just as I'm slamming the trunk closed I look up and see 2 guys walking on either side of my car...walking fast. This is what happens in my brain in the .5 second it takes them to walk by: Holy crap they're going to beat me up, steal my cookies and take off in my car, with my kid!!!!! I seriously gasped really loudly and had to get out of the way because one of them was walking so fast...but that's all they did. They just walked by, perfectly innocently; probably thinking that I'm the biggest weirdo they have ever seen. So I get in my car, shaking so badly that I can't even get the keys in the ignition.
As I drive away I'm kind of laughing at myself for being so ridiculous...but oh no, the paranoia doesn't stop there. Every time I stop at a stoplight I look around to see if anyone is going to come up to my window and punch through the glass (I've seen too many movies). Even down to the last second when I open my garage door. I can't close it fast enough, just in case some crazy person decides to sneak in at the last second. Absolutely nuts...I know.

The thing is, I don't consider myself a paranoid person...not like some people I know...but sometimes I am really able to freak myself out. If the littlest thing seems off to me, I can blow it WAY out of proportion and think of the worst case scenario. I think it's just because it was late at night, I was out by myself in the dark in the not the nicest part of town, and I knew that Steve wasn't at home...all those things just sent my mind racing. I feel a little bad, and I didn't mean to judge those seemingly nice mall rats...but, ya know...I was alone!

Please tell me I'm not the only one who has crazy incidents like this!

32 comments:

Kara said...

OK, you are totally talking about me as being one of those paranoid FREAKS!!! Do you see why I don't watch any movies. I was freaked out just reading about it. Emily, DO NOT go out by yourself at night! Take another paranoid freak like me with you so you can be even more freaked out. I probably would have left the stroller and the cookies!

Kim said...

Oh my gosh, Emily! You just decribed me! I ALWAYS freak out about stuff like that and I always seem to have the worst case scenario running through my mind, too. What's wrong with us? I know it's good to be on your guard but it definitely can't be good to totally freak out like that, right? Hah hah hah!

Danielle said...

Oh man, I have a feeling there is going to be a major trend of women saying you described exact situations they've had! I totally do that- I know I'll do it even more after I have kids. Everytime it happens, when I get home- I check every corner of my small apartment to make sure a bad guy isn't HIDING in my cheap apt with nothing to steal, to go after ME. I don't know why we do this. Just know you're not alone! I'm always looking over my back- even in rexburg!

Paul & Ashley Justensen Family said...

So, two questions? Why was Steve studying? I thought he was done with school. And second, what kind of cookies were they??? If someone is going to beat you up and steal a car with a child in the back just for the cookies, I have got to know what they are!!!!

Emily said...

Ashley: They were buy 3 get one free, so I had a PB one, reeses pieces, gingersnap and chocolate chip. I don't know if I could have given them up very easily. Oh, and Steve is studying for bar number 2 (Nevada...he already did Idaho) which he takes in 2 days.

Alifinale said...

My favorite part of the story was when you said that they were going to steal your cookies. I love you. You are not alone in this, if I let me imagination wander then I get carried away with my crazy thoughts. It is no fun to be out on your own at night, and especially feel vulnerable with a kid in tow. Glad you are safe and sound.

*Stephanie Lance* said...

dang grel, i'm sure i would have acted the same way! I'm going to tell you soemthing that will cheer you right up and make you feel better because i have something similar except it's blown WAY out! haha Well everytime i would leave your parents house at night to go to my house.....15 steps away...i'm so scraed that someone is in the bushes and is going to run after me and follow me into my house! haha it's the WORST feeling and i can't imagine being scared for myself, my baby AND MY COOKIE!!!!!! hahaha love you!!!

Emily said...

Steph...I totally feel your pain. Running home from the Arnold's was SO SCARY!!! Remember the big tree at the Morris'...I thought for sure someone was always hiding behind that thing!

Lindsay said...

Oh I totally know what you mean. I only became paranoid like that when I had Allie... before I had no fear, didn't think twice about my own safety, but now I totally think that everyone is out to kidnap Allie. Be careful though! Vegas is full of crazies! Be honest though, were you more concerned about your car, or your cookies?

Oh, and good luck to Steve!

The Grahams said...

It sounds to me like you had every right to be totally freaked out! Did those guys really have to walk so quick right by your car? I would have started yelling help before they were even that close!! You just never know now a days.... glad you guys are safe and sound! Good luck to Steve on the bar!

Ilene said...

Next time go back into your store my friend and wait until they're gone!

Or start breaking out the HSM dance. That would get the potential perps thinking twice before attacking.

AMY AND MIKEY said...

Ask Lizzie about paranoia about safety. yikes. Second- I think it's good to be aware of what's going on around us- my dad wouldn't let us go across the street to play if it was dark- he would watch us- or walk us- so I've grown up very paranoid- thanks to my dad- (thanks- seriosuly and sarcastically) BUT- I don't think it's bad that you judged them- it's not your fault we live in an unsafe world where we are forced to think that way. Don't feel bad- I do think it's funny you thought of your cookies- And in answer to your question- yes I do freak out all the time- I carry pepper spray. do you? you should if you don't. I'm so glad you are safe and nothign happened.

Teresa, mom, Deitz, Aunt Dee Dee said...

Great story, I think that we have all been through moments like that. I'm surprised the paranoia didn't go on into the house, that's what would have happened to me.

Tell Steve good luck on the bar! I think he'll do great.

Love ya guys.

Bringhursts said...

That's just plain smart to be aware of your surroundings. I used to work with victims of violent crimes and most of them became victims because they never thought anything bad could happen to them. I do the exact same thing when Eth and I are out alone (key facing outward, etc). We all need to buy ourselves a big old can of mace.

Chad and Jessica said...

LOL, how you described everything was so funny. I could sense the desperation and distress you felt. I do the same thing, but sometimes I think i'm not careful enough. But, it's so easy to freak yourself out....once your thoughts start racing, it just gets worse and your imagination and adrenaline take over. But it's always better to be safe than sorry!

Brynne, Aaron and Cade said...

I'm with ya Em. And I'm TOTALLY the paranoid type. Can't help it and I figure better safe than sorry. Glad you were safe and nothing came of it. Gotta watch out for those mall rats anyway. :)

Lindsay Coudron said...

you crack me up. I have definately had that happen a few times, but maybe not to that extent:) I guess it's better to be safe than sorry:)

Miriam said...

So funny! I'm right there with you. I don't live in the safest neighborhood so I get paranoid whenever a car so much as pauses in front of my house! I took a self defense class before moving to Cleveland and that was both good and bad. Good because now I have some options of what to do if I was ever in a bad situation but bad because I think that everything has the potential to become a bad situation. Damon think's I'm paranoid but I think I'm just trying to be safe. But I have to admit that my very active imagination does not help me there!

Lawther family said...

That is so funny! I do that all the time! So perfectly put! Thanks for a laugh!

Jill said...

Amen to all this stuff. It is good to be aware of what's going on around you and it's better to be safe than sorry for sure. I think I need to be more paranoid and aware.

Sorry about all the studying! Sounds like you're almost done! Good luck to Steve!

Carol and Bruce said...

Way to scare Mom/gma to death! I couldn't wait to get to the end of the story to find out you weren't hurt. I think it comes naturally so that we will be aware, I am that way and maybe too much but I agree better safe than sorry. Please be safe and don't take any chances, you just have to watch the news to see that awful things happen every day to people who never thought it would be them or their family.

Please be sure to tell Steve we love him and GOOD LUCK!! Kiss Easton a ton of times too.

Lara said...

Em,
Not to burst your bubble, but the key thing has (I believe) been proven not to work. Cell phone ready to dail 911 a better choice. This is coming from the queen of all paranoids... Ask the Fam. I think I coined the phrase!!!
Love Ya

Aimee said...

I'm so glad the everyone...and everything (ie:the cookies) is ok! What a scary experience and its the worst and always ten times as scary when you're by yourself without someone big to protect you.

Amy said...

I know you have a million comments but I am the same. I freak myself out soooo bad all of the time. And not just when I am out but when I am home too. When any sort of natural disaster happens somewhere else I freak out trying to make plans on what I would do if it happend to me. For example after the bridge collapsed last summer I couldn't sleep for days because I was trying to plan what I would do if I plunged into the water in my car with two kids. I still don't know what I would do but I finally let it go. I think having kids ups the whole freak out factor!

AMY AND MIKEY said...

Ok I made a mistake- My parents love the rocker- hate alexandria. had to clear that up.

Jen Lee said...

This post cracks me up! Yeah, I'm always imagining bad guys, especially here in Vegas, even though it's probably more likely to happen in rural Idaho where I think I'm safe. Once I watched an X-Files about a little crippled Hindu guy who pushed himself around in this squeaky little wagon and attacked people, and I had to have someone walk me home afterward. I kept imagining I heard that creepy squeak following me!

Christi said...

I know you aren't referring to me Emily :) Because the whole world is out to get me! That would have totally freaked me out. I am glad they didn't get you or your cookies :) Or Easton.

Anonymous said...

Lara,
I'd be willing to bet if I had a key facing outward, and I punched someone in the eye, they would stop whatever they were doing.

While the 911 thing is a smart idea, the attack may be over by the time the po po arrive.

Jenni.Woodmansee said...

dude, i totally do the same thing. sometimes if i watch a movie or something, i get really paranoid about everything. like, am i gonna slip on the ice, get hit by a car, get a disease, is someone looking in my window??? haha dumb i know.

Basically I'm just so glad that there was nothing to worry about and your safe!

love yoU!

Our Pratt Pack said...

You're not alone. I don't even go out anymore at night because it takes me forever to get 3 in their seats and I don't want to leave my back exposed that long who knows what could happen.

LeAnn said...

Just remember that FEAR is a GIFT! Please please learn to listen and to heed. Next time go back in the mall and ask for an escort--that is what the security guys are supposed to do! DO NOT be afraid of LOOKING silly! Some things are just too important to take risks with (you, Easton, cookies etc) Love you tons, when are you coming up to see us?

Sharon/Mom/ Grandma said...

You're definitely not alone!! Loved the part about them stealing your cookies! The key is not being out at night!!! I know we have to sometimes, but not when we don't have to. I think generally we are always safe, but I think we have to be careful! Have a Mormon Tab CD handy and pop that baby in when you are scared it always stops the fear!!! Your Easton is sooooo cute. I love you!!!! If you ever come to the coast stop and see me!!!